vilnuis

The ten hour journey wasn't bad apart from worrying whether I'd miss the stop where I had to change. The stations over here aren't great with signage. I was put out a little as I travelled through a time zone change so I was worried which time to use; Polish or Lithuanian. Logic prevailed in the end. My passport was scanned, yes scanned, by 2 officials en route and my ticket was checked 8 times. Red tape stills rules. I suspect that there'll be a few counterfeits knocking around soon.

Hostel is 200m from the station. Lonely Planet made the place out to be the very embodiment of hedonism and general mayhem. It's dull. It's run down. It's not up to scratch. The washing machine doesn't work. I had to go commando on my first night. Not much fun in minus 5. The other folk who are resident are dullard's too. Each trying to outdo each other in being boring f*cks. I washed some clothes by hand and ventured out into the Old Town.

And lo, there are no Irish bars in Vilnuis.

Some of my readers will be pleased to hear I spent my first evening drinking in an English bar. Yes, you read right! It escapes me completely as to what distinguishes it as an English bar, apart from an Union Jack draped outside. Anyway, had an entertaining evening talking to some old bloke who claims to be an Aristocratic Lithuanian. An Earl, no less. The Russians booted them off their land in 1940 and those, who could, fled to Chicago. Appartently that's the capital of Eastern Europe in exile. When the lithuanians achieved independence in 1991, he returned to claim the ancestral estate of some 140 hectares, which had been nationalised by the Russians. He was lucky (if he is to be believed, of course) as if he had surrendered his passport and took up citizenship in the US, then they would have told him to stick it. There was the small matter of evicting the Russian General who had lived there for some years. He let him a stay for a further two years. Well, Earl Val is now the editor of the Lithunanian National Radio Station, a branch similar to the BBC world service. Typically enough, when you meet an Aristocrat, forget about them standing you a pint. Bourgeoise c*nt!

And lo, an Irish bar is opening in the next month, and lo, it is to be called 'Dubliner'.

The next evening was much better. I met a French Phd student at the hostel and we went clubbing. His Doctoral thesis covered an area of much interest to me. Polish-German post-war relations! I am being serious. Anyway, I was unable to learn all a lot as both of us spent all evening staring in awe at all the pretty women. Not for the faint hearted. Later, after much beer and vodka, I partaked in some dancing......

All said Vilnuis is a nice place, if a little low key. It has all the usual East European things; an Old Town, nice buildings and a certain communist attitude to service. I'd recommend it though. In 1998, an area of 140 acres and a similar number of residents declared themselves independent. It was an artistic thing! Anyway, I sought out the Frank Zappa statue and it's constitution which is etched in metal. No joy, got to it but too dark to see anything. It is now getting dark at 3pm so if I choose to get boll*cks the night before then it will affect the number of things I can see! Oh, the place calls itself 'the Republic of Uzupis, or the Republic of Angels'.