salzburg part one
The journey to Salzburg wasn't long. Just 4 hours. Nice. It was a feast for the eyes too. The passing countryside was covered in snow and I enjoyed looking at the different types of villages and the houses. It was the first time I had an opportunity to goof out of the train window and see things. I have mostly travelled in the dark. Literally.
Arriving at the train station, I found the hostel very quickly. I was chuffed that in my six bed dorm there was no other evidence of others 'rooming' there too. Not bad for 16 euros. From the tourist maps, I noted four Irish pubs! In a town of 145,000! As I set off through the streets, the whole thing about Salzburg struck me. It's so beautiful. Enchanting. Fairy tale like. I was always a little sceptical about the picture postcard description of a place. It is true...go to Salzburg when the snow caps the mountains.
Headed straight for the shamrock, had a few beers, talked to a few people and moved on to O'Malleys. Loathe as I was to go to a pub bearing the name of my family's solictor but I found some cool people there. By this stage I was in my yak-yak mode. Then off to the Dubliner. Owned by a most cordial bloke but he would be, he's from Finglas, named Ken. He operates a great little part of Ireland there. Maybe the office of foreign affairs should send over some dough as I'm sure he provides better value for Ireland's international reputation than any over-paid ambassador. Pissed and jolly I decide to head back to the hostel. I stopped off at the Shamrock on the way, one for the ditch and all that.
I spent a while talking a load of shite to a bunch of girls but was quite happy to do so. Two were lesbians and how shall I put it, weren't afraid to flaunt it. Didn't matter to me. Anyway, this bloke was giving them the 'I'm hetrosexual, how can you be lesbains?, check out my mickey and you'll be hetro again' thing. Know it? Happens apparently. Given the copious amounts I had drank, I couldn't put up with it anymore. I told him 'Fuck off, and leave them alone'. He started to gesture wildly at me. Then, the barman came over and threw him out. After 30 minutes of drunken dancing , I decided to leave, by now very pissed. And who's outside? This geezer!
I felt I would get my retaliation in first. I figured he had been waiting for me. So in order to grab the initiative, I walked straight up to him and said ' you wanna have it then lets have it". Drunken gobshite. He shouted back at me and I continued with my chant, getting progressively more aggressive. I could tell he was scared so I thought half the job was done. Then along comes a police car and three rozzers jump out. Fuck. He went into over ride ranting and I asked the rozzers politely if I could explain the whole 'defence of the lesbian' thing. They took my details and said it would be best if I were to go home. Cool. He remained and what happened thereafter I don't know. The journey is 15 minutes but it took me an hour. Ended up hugging some middle aged women because she gave me directions. She must have thought I was going to rape her or something. The important thing was I didn't get arrested. I wouldn't have deserved it but you never know. Wrongful convictions and soon a movement would rise to 'Free the Salzburg One'.
Next morning I recognised one of the barman. In my Hostel. Sitting beside me at breakfast! This was an awful feeling. I told him my story and he said the bloke I encountered called the police to protest about being thrown out. He's now barred. Apparently, he's the 241st to be barred from that boozer. Phew!
Maybe I should have given him a dig........
Arriving at the train station, I found the hostel very quickly. I was chuffed that in my six bed dorm there was no other evidence of others 'rooming' there too. Not bad for 16 euros. From the tourist maps, I noted four Irish pubs! In a town of 145,000! As I set off through the streets, the whole thing about Salzburg struck me. It's so beautiful. Enchanting. Fairy tale like. I was always a little sceptical about the picture postcard description of a place. It is true...go to Salzburg when the snow caps the mountains.
Headed straight for the shamrock, had a few beers, talked to a few people and moved on to O'Malleys. Loathe as I was to go to a pub bearing the name of my family's solictor but I found some cool people there. By this stage I was in my yak-yak mode. Then off to the Dubliner. Owned by a most cordial bloke but he would be, he's from Finglas, named Ken. He operates a great little part of Ireland there. Maybe the office of foreign affairs should send over some dough as I'm sure he provides better value for Ireland's international reputation than any over-paid ambassador. Pissed and jolly I decide to head back to the hostel. I stopped off at the Shamrock on the way, one for the ditch and all that.
I spent a while talking a load of shite to a bunch of girls but was quite happy to do so. Two were lesbians and how shall I put it, weren't afraid to flaunt it. Didn't matter to me. Anyway, this bloke was giving them the 'I'm hetrosexual, how can you be lesbains?, check out my mickey and you'll be hetro again' thing. Know it? Happens apparently. Given the copious amounts I had drank, I couldn't put up with it anymore. I told him 'Fuck off, and leave them alone'. He started to gesture wildly at me. Then, the barman came over and threw him out. After 30 minutes of drunken dancing , I decided to leave, by now very pissed. And who's outside? This geezer!
I felt I would get my retaliation in first. I figured he had been waiting for me. So in order to grab the initiative, I walked straight up to him and said ' you wanna have it then lets have it". Drunken gobshite. He shouted back at me and I continued with my chant, getting progressively more aggressive. I could tell he was scared so I thought half the job was done. Then along comes a police car and three rozzers jump out. Fuck. He went into over ride ranting and I asked the rozzers politely if I could explain the whole 'defence of the lesbian' thing. They took my details and said it would be best if I were to go home. Cool. He remained and what happened thereafter I don't know. The journey is 15 minutes but it took me an hour. Ended up hugging some middle aged women because she gave me directions. She must have thought I was going to rape her or something. The important thing was I didn't get arrested. I wouldn't have deserved it but you never know. Wrongful convictions and soon a movement would rise to 'Free the Salzburg One'.
Next morning I recognised one of the barman. In my Hostel. Sitting beside me at breakfast! This was an awful feeling. I told him my story and he said the bloke I encountered called the police to protest about being thrown out. He's now barred. Apparently, he's the 241st to be barred from that boozer. Phew!
Maybe I should have given him a dig........
posted by Ciarán at 7:54 p.m.
2 Comments:
Excellent web site. Reminds me of Friday afternoon/evening in Holborn!! I will view your future travels with interest.
Hello Ciaran, Salzburg part 1 made me laugh my socks off! I like to think of you roaming round the world protecting lesbians and alarming middle aged women!
Take care, Anne W
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